Ivan, We may need a few more than those, otherwise we might be sitting on each others laps! Tara
Tara,We need a bigger tub!The club is too large!Gonna rent out the Philippine Bowl.Come on Monsoon!Ivan
Ivan, Rent away but save me a place... if you do not mind. Tara
Liz,Wave right over the edge!Soaked the dog and then he jumped right in.Good thing JR's dog is part-retriever.The other part in French.Oh-oh, did I see someone with a camcorder?
Covers self. No camera's ... whats the name of that old bond movie.... For your eyes only?Tara
I'm over here.Omigod, I think I saw fins.Jacques Custeau in full scuba drag.Damned Frenchies!"Octopus, octopus," he keeps saying."That's no octopus," I yell out.That's the lady of fable that you named your boat after."That's the nymph Calypso."
Stand and point me in the right direction. I shall hide behind you, if you do not mind.Tara
She was afraid to come out of the locker,She was as nervous as she could be.She was afraid to come out of the locker,She was afraid that somebody would see!(Two, three, four, tell the people what she wore!)It was an itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow polka-dot bikini,That she wore for the first time today.An itsy bitsy teeny weenie yellow polka-dot bikini,So in the locker she wanted to stay!
Oh no she does not want to stay in a locker... she wants come out and play, but she does not need more than one for an audience.
Okay, okay.I'll get rid of the frog prince with the camera.Here, I had on this nice pornstache.San Francisco.Yoo-hoo!
Then what... will he hate me in the morning?
Men appreciate not only sex.They also appreciate beauty.Ah, Venus on the half-shell.Time in a Botticelli.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, they say. And sex ... well it can be quite wonderful, but after one needs more than just that. Heaven forbid, bordem sets in.Physical attractiveness, it all fine and good, but give me something more tangible.
They broke our reverie.Aw, always Scrooge come callin' at the front door here.Creditors at my doorstep.Bankrupts make lousy lovers.Gotta towel off and face the real world.'Scuse me. Oooh. That was nice!Ivan
I'm not even going to touch the last line of your post with a ten--foot pole.Did I just say that??I see the party's at Ivan's again. Can I bring my rubber ducky?Heh.
I had a bad feeling about posting the spa pictures! And I should warn you that I don't like to share my pool toys.
Josie,I am the ten-foot Pole.(I wish).
Josie,Yes, bring your rubber duckie.And, to risk an oxymoron, your sexy yellow puddle jumpers?We can galumph around, swoosh, swoosh, glump!Ivan
geewits,I stole your spa shot.I knew that would come back and haunt me, especially with my tendency towards rococo humour.I still say watch out for periscopes. You never know what to expect from Dieter, the angst-ridden German.Achtung!Ivan
I'm bringing my spare tire. HAH!!!
Ivan, way to go! I remember your last wild 'n crazy hot tub party that splashed over into my place and into Josie's. JR had lost his yellow rubber duckie, too!I hope the cop Josie chewed out this morning doesn't barge in and bust us! I'll have to stash my crack. Hah! Have fun with that one! ~Liz
Everyone move closer together here comes the walking man aka fat ass in a speedo.
The cop was waaay cute. He's welcome to join the pool party. Gun optional. Heh.
Tara what did you do?
Leslie,What if the lifeguard booms out,"Hand in all flotation gear!"Ivan
Liz,Will have to do a carom, as in billiards.Rosie O'Donnell was picked up at the border with thirty pounds of crack.Ivan
The Walking Man,Omigod, watch out for drugged bikers from the club across the road. They might do an Altamount or Monterey '69 rock concert on you, fat guy in a speedo...Beat you with pool cues.Upset Gracie Slick of the Aiplane."Someone's doing a weird!"Ivan
Josie,Oh the brutality of those boot-clad feet! How can you control yourself!Ivan
I'd better explain that.Some women might come to cop a feel. Josie felt a cop!
TWM,Tara tells Ivan all men are perverts! :)Ivan
Guess, by Tara's standards I ain't a man then, just a fat guy in a speedo who ain't afraid of the Hell's Angels, not even the Canadian ones...eh. See I can speak the Canadian language eh.Peacemark
TWM,I guess I was putting words in Tara's mouth. I think she just doesn't like young guys all that much.Watch out, Walking Man of The World!Canadianisms.Quebecois:What yout call dat t'ing dat bash his face against de tree?Le Woodpecker?Lol.IvanIvan
Oh what the hell.Fat guys welcome at the hot tub party.The girls might pinch and tuck at you.Rub your belly for good luck.Ivan
I'm Chris Hansen from Dateline. We're doing a new series on "To Catch A Hot Tubbin' Blogger." Are you surprised? Why did you do it? We caught you in the act, periscope and all.
Don't worry Ivan. They have no jurisdiction in Canada.
Tabernac!Ah honest-to-god correspondent from NBC!Hello Chris Hansen!What god has wrought.Our party has made waves.
Come on now, JR. Your hot tub picture is on the road to notoriety. :)See what happens when I pick up o a wild idea of yours in the middle of the night and use it in a blog?Ivan
should read "on a wild idea of yours..."Ivan
Josie,I think I'll send the quarks an email.Aquatic quarks. Lol.I think I'm going to have a beer.Ivan
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Oh, I don't know.Why not?JR just made a dick out of me.Ivan
POWER FAILURE AT MY BUILDING, Thurs. Sept 6. THEY WILL REPAIR NOON, LOCAL TIME.PROBABLY JUST AS WELL, THE WAY THINGS HAVE BEEN GOING. :)IVAN
so do the finns, count me in!!(just call me risto, honourary finn-man. together we can sauna, swim, and dis the russians.)
I did nothing. I like all men, just perfer ones with class. Now waling man, I love your writing, so you can sit by me but I am wearing some shades. Your speedos glow in the dark! Next time maybe we both should wear orange eh?
See Walking man, your speedos are so bright I spelled your name wrong!
Finns run naked in the snow and beat each other with birch-boughs.Don't know why they do that.Ivan
The Fat Man cometh.Ivan
Hmm, naked in the snow.... now I walk barefoot in it sometimes. But naked ... I shall have to think about that.i see no fat man ::peers over shades::
Ah, he'll be by.Even if the local Angels threaten to beat him with pool cues instead of birch boughs.He no afraid of Canadian Hell's Angels, he says.Ivan
I'll tell you why, but you won't understand until you try it. It's the best feeling in the world, that's why. Those extreme temperatures don't just exfoliate, they bring dead skin back to LIFE! might even revive that career of yours, but i don't believe you're on life 9 just yet. maybe 7, which gives you two more rounds of brilliance.
::scoots over:: I don't mind he can sit here... All are welcome.
Got it, Benji. (You copying, Tara? Heh)."...they bring dead skin back to LIFE! ...Like Tara says in her last comment re The Walking Man?, ::scoots over:: I don't mind he can sit here... All are welcome."Whee. We can beat each other with birch boughs.Heh. Come to think of it, I have been a bad boy. :)...................About my saying that this here cat is on life #9 and counting, thanks for the whiskers-up, Benji.Ivan
To Catch a Predator, Fly Fishing for Beginners, Forecasting the Cost of Chemical Dependency (some of Hansen's books). Ohmigosh, Ivan, do you think some "google keywords" set off warning bells somewhere?Hey! We might see you on Dateline.You can tell the world you are running for Canadian Optimus Prime Mister (not just mayor)! Btw, I'm still voting Christopher Walkin for President. ~Liz
All I can say at this point is: Unbelievable.Donnetta
Liz,I think Chris Hansen plays in a rock'n'roll band.That JR and his vagaries.Next time he'll sign himself as Q, out of StarTrek, that other mischief-maker.But then what if that really was Chris Hansen...Oh hell, you can fool me five times. Shucks, I could run for President...At least I could try. You listening, Arnold?JR's next book: Trout Fishing in Ontario.*&^%$#$%^^%$%%%%%%%%Ivan
Donnetta,Hunter S. Thompson says "When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro."Well, my name is Pro....Let's crank this sucker up to a hundred comments!You out there Eric1313?Ivan
Okay, okay I am back... was I missed... and who took my goggles... walking man was that you?
nope I was the one that untied the bow of the bra top to the yellow polka dot bikini...goggles are more Ivan's thing.Peacemark
Uhhh Ivan i have Canadian relatives well armed and Detroit neighbors in need of a vacation now that they are off parole and have a few scores to settle with bikers.But beyond all that I fear nothing, not even fear itself. Now fat ass in the orange speedos is getting ready to stand on the edge of this thing and do a belly flop.oh yeah andPeaceTWM
::covers face::: bellllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy flopppppppppppppppppp!!!! Incoming!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ivan!! Give me back my googles!
Splish-Splash.Welcome back,Tara.Hey, you didn't bring Eric1313 with you.I thought you guys, being both poets, would try some new forms, uh, like digital.I stole youg goggles because I am a deep diver (Like Jacques Custeau).Damn Frenchies!Ivan
Walking Man,I dive deep--and fancy-- with my stolen goggles.When Dashing Jacques goes down, he...Oh-oh. There goes my General rating with the blogs. :)Ivan
Okay, okay.Here are your goggles.Ever-vigilant Ivan now switching to binoculars.Periscope sighting.What famous Indian chief said "damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead"?Ah well, that's what I get for a community college education.I can't even spell fock.ivan
woohoo!! Down periscope!
Shiver me timbersAnd blow me down.Red sky at morningSailors take warning!
By the way Eric has been a tad busy as of late. Perhaps he will show his head later this night.
walking man I just realized you sent me hunting after Ivan for my goggles because wanted to make your speedo escape from me for undoing the Bikini strap. ::towel smack::: how'd you like that!
I got kicked out of a Texas party for this:Well smack a fat man's ass!
Ha! I won't kick you out, but would you please tie the strap back?
Hey Walking Man.This is a frontal model!Button hooks!Millinery fasteners?
I'm going for a drink... be back in a bit. Anyone care to join me?
Well, my liquor cabinet is bare.Like us!The Walking Man got smacked.Maybe he can offer us some. Or some Ritalin, or Tarvin--there's all sort of stuff in his medicine cabinet. :)How dry I am!Ivan
And yet I repeat: Unbelievable!Donnetta
Yes, Donnetta.Here am I alone in the tub, and it finally hits me:How did I clear out the room so fast?I am overexposed!It's like I joked to my two-year-old son many years ago: "You are so immature!"I think we've hit National Lampoon standards--but at least they made money!Gotta get back to that Blues Brothers groove. Where is John?Ivan
I am back... I have the smoothest of red velvet wines and I am ready to relax... ahhhh... warm waters melt me like butter!
"Walk right inSet right downBaby let your mind roll on."Oh, thanks for the drink.Been kinda lonesome here, but Donnetta did drop by and said she couldn't believe...Here I was , practising tongue-twisters from Broadcasting101 under water (Glug):Betty Botter bought some butter,"But," she said, "this butter's bitter.If I bake this bitter butter,It will make my batter bitter.But a bit of better butter -That would make my batter better."So she bought a bit of butter,Better than her bitter butter,And she baked it in her batter,And the batter was not bitter.So 'twas better Betty BotterBought a bit of better butter.Glug glug. She sells seashells down by the seashore.Mary, Mary, quite contrary, how does your garden grow?With silver bells and cockleshells...And one friggin' tulip!In Florida, I used to go "shelling" for turnip whelks.Wow that's a turnip with attitude!Must be my hot-dog diet of late.I am turning into a hot dog.(Speaking of hot dogs, you gotta check out Josie's site).Must be the heat lamps.I am fast succumbing.Ivan
lol Ivan .... you sure you didn't drink any of my wine?
I liked the ass smack...shows how much I matured because didn't feel it....but here Ivan tar to go with your wine and melt better than butter...have some ten mg Of Valium I take four at a time and some 8 mg of Zanaflex...I take those to wash the Valium down with and heres an 80 of Cymbalta...capsule swallow with wine...and i can certainly spare y'all some 600mg Neurontin's...I prefer 4 of those at once to to get that no nerve pain response...lets party like it's 1999 or would that be 1969?orange looks so good on me no one will ever mistake me for a polar bear!Tara what's that over ther====> twm does the front bra closure with one hand that never forgets old skills.hahahahapeace
Oh My goodness walking man I am shocked! lol:::grabs Ivans towel and ducks behind the tree::Help? Help? Little help here, please?
Lucy and the Sky with Diamondsohhh ohhh"Relax your mind,Relax your mindAnd you'll livea long timeOne timeYou gotta relaxyour mind..."Ridin' along in your automobileWith your handson the wheel.One timeYou gotta relax your mindRelax your mindRelax your mindAnd you'll livea long timeOne timeYou gotta relaxYour mind.Hey, that's good wine.But why am I hallucinating?Lucy and the sky...
Why am I hallucinating?I am Pavlov's dog, salivating over what The Walking man has to offer.He says, have some ten mg Of Valium I take four at a time and some 8 mg of Zanaflex...I take those to wash the Valium down with and heres an 80 of Cymbalta...capsule swallow with wine...and i can certainly spare y'all some 600mg Neurontin's...I prefer 4 of those at once to to get that no nerve pain response...lets party like it's 1999 or would that be l969?Jeesus,Dr. Owlsley has nothing on you, man.You are a walking pharmacy.Ivan
Tara,Get out from behind that tree.You could be Daphne, and I Apollo....To get away from him, she turned herself into a tree!Poor Apollo.Not even a knothole!Does all this sound Greek to you?Ivan
Ivan, I have no idea why you would be hallucinating.. of course there is always all those pickles that Peter Piper picked... how many did you eat?
Reminds me of the time I was going home on leave from Philadelphia and dropped a hit of fresh windowpane LSD and drove from Philly to Detroit.They don't make recreation like that anymore
Inside",That's so cute!...I had the entire jar.Can't believe I ate the whole thing! Musta been a mushroom or two in there. Darn Chinese inspectors!
lol pun intended...but no... apollo and daphne... love but from such hate.
TWM,Philly to Detroit?That's a long gig, man.And all the uphostery coming out houndstooth and sparkle. :)Ivan
blue like a winter snowblack like the silhouette of the trees.I want you to remember me not that wayNatalie MerchantI want you to remember me like a wave from Posieden.in orange speedos
Love Ms. Merchant walking man. Great music when in the thinking/feeling mood.
Naw just one of the things I did that should have killed me but didn't, it was more like driving through a John Wayne movie.Only I didn't know who was directing and whether I was a cowboy or Indianmaybe I'll ask the shrink next week that ought to get him talking
Tara she like youyouse both is da' bomb
Daphne may have turned into a tree, but Apollo still got his love. He loved her no matter her state and in the end Daphne was glad to be held in such a manner.Oh sweet lord!
Aww, Mark, I think you are as sweet as a fresh picked peach ripened by the summer sun and ready to be eaten.
You guys are cracking me up and Natalie Merchant is highly evocative.Looks like we're going to break l00 tonight.I am starting to flag.You kids are too hip for me.What time is it getting to be?This is a bit like a trip.But the old eyelids are getting heavy.I'll be a doormouse tomorrow if I'n no already.The Mask of Zorro!...zzzzzzzzIvan
You guys crashing on me? If so can someone hand me a towel, so I can change?
Night Night everyone.... Sleep well and love easy....smiles
Tara's already got my towel.Ah, hell, here's linen napkin.Omigod.My penis droops!I am tired!
Like what you said about Daphne and Apollo, Tara.Hoo ha. I gotta get some rest.Good night Tara, and all that may have watched this surreal programme.And godspeedo, Mark.I'm outta here.Ivan
it is late but I have to get a nerve block shot into my spinal cord later this morning and I prefer to be tired when the puncture the cord, helps me be perfectly still so they hit the right spot,finished the dog and bear tonight too so maybe i am wound down enough now...here Tara here's a pair of my clean black under wear (44's) and a clean tank top xxx large and one safety pin.sleep soundly Friendspeacemark
...And so to bed.
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