Saturday, March 22, 2008

"The bird was fragile, young and gay"

I think blogger Donnetta and BK's working on the garden this weekend got me into a springtme state of mind, but it's just wisful thinking here in the Toronto area. Brrrr. Robins are wearing snowshoes. And scarves.
Tonight (second day of Spring) will be one of the coldest nights of so-called winter, zero degrees on anybody's thermometer, and all those miguided
Al Gore fans, that is to say, arriviste robins, are walking around on miniature snowshoes and neat
little comforters.

This is a bad night for naked robins.

But there they were, picking at someting on the edges of huge snowbanks, as if on the edges of retreating glaciers, so high the banks, farther up the meadow, hammering hell out of the high Sumach, surviving, even so like the rest of us Ontarians, the worst winter in ten years.

"What happened to Al Gore?" I asked a twenty-something

But she is from Keswick Ontario, which, they tell me , is a lot like Appalachia, and she responded with: "Al Gore sucks.a ..."

Just me and my snowshoed robin out here, neither sure who is whose meal, here in Dumpster Diver heaven.

A sage Greek Dominion employee passes us and remarks, as I stumble in he snow, looking for vegetables, "At least the robin knows what he's doing."
Does he? Poor litle gaffer flew 1800 miles to freez his pretty red touche on thirty-foot high snowbanks.

We laughed ten years ago, when Mayor Mel calle in the Army to fight the snow.
Just a few hoots this year, if Mayor Miller had calledthe Army back--hardly anybody would have laughed.
Wimpy Torontonians calling in the Army every time there is a major storm!

But this has surely been an ice age, Al Gore be jiggered.

We been Gored!



Donnetta Lee said...

Hey, maybe I'm first tonight. Yes, BK has just about worn me out today. We trimmed bushes (I know, Bush needs to be trimmed.), cut branches (and what branches don't need to be cut), and bagged leaves. Tore down the railing around the balcony, too. I think I will be sore all over my body by tomorrow morning. Groan. BK wants to load up all the dead stuff in the pick up and haul it off tomorrow. Maybe I'll get lucky. Maybe it will rain. Or snow.

Anonymous said...


I responded in e-mail intead of here.

Not only am I seeing double of late, but so is, (I swear)--blogger.


eric1313 said...

I feel ya, Ivan. At least in regards to the temperature drop so contrary to a supposed global warming. I almost welcome a jungle of kudzu around here. It would look better than rusting, closed down factories and roads with so many potholes you'd think this was Beirut.

Actually, I wouldn't mind being in Lebanon. I hear they have some sweet discotheques.

And those dark haired olive skinned beauties are out of this world! No wonder the guys over there want them to be veiled!

Hope you're hanging in there, Ivan.

Peace out

eric1313 said...

Seriously about the women over there--melt my heart and re-cast it in Shaharazade's locket.

(if she had one, that is)

ivan@creativewriting.c said...


Musn't let the old summer-job factory worker, get the best of me, but I did get onto Rock'n'roll afterwards.
Didn't Kurt Cobain write domethinng once about a Heart-Shaped Box.?

Anonymous said...

Well it's Easter.

I got a huge kick out of some remustered Seminarians At Ryerson University, Toronto (defrocked?) who used to joke at this time of year. "I'ts about time we got that dude ouf of that rosebush?


ea monroe said...

Happy Easter, Ivan. Already been out to roll back the stone, have you? ;-) We have robins year round. During the our last ice storm there were huge flocks of robins flying around. They're hearty birds. ~Liz

Josie said...

Ivan, you have all missed the point. In fact, you have made the case for your own argument. It is climate change not global warming. That is a misnomer.

The climate is indeed changing, by the way you are describing your winter there, "the worst winter in ten years."

It is indeed starting to happen, and we are still scoffing at it and laughing at Al Gore.

He who laughs last....

ivan@creativewriting.c said...

What's this I hear about the Ice Pack reforming?

Just my opinion, but sometimes I think Tipper will long outlive Al.
Here is hoping she won't see the day when she realizes that her husband,though
cretanly no loser, and a billiant market strtegist, may have been full of little beans on this one.

Charles Gramlich said...

Lana certainly does not miss the cold of Canada. She likes it here in the sun.

Anonymous said...

Gore is currently sitting beside his bituminus fired stove,humming several licks from "smoke on the water",while carefully guiding the raft of his logic towards the falls...a rather inconvenient place to be,eh?...the earth wobbles,the climate changes...alpha and recently released CIA documents show,Noah's Ark was built and maintained by amateurs,while the Titanic was built and maintained by professionals...Hal...move some of the funiture,will ya?...

Anonymous said...


Sounds like JM.


Anonymous said...


Sorry to answer late.

Back from walk. Both ffinger and computer seem frozen.


eric1313 said...

I wasn't laughing at Al Gore! I agree with him that we as a collective body are destroying the very environment that nurtured us to this point. But even the yeast in a wine bottle die off from the wastes generated by living, reproducing and dying. The earth is just a big jeroboam. The only way for us to stop polluting it is to leave it, I think. Heck, the amount of CO2 that the animals we breed in order to eat is staggering. We not only have to conserve resources, we have to limit our own fecundity. Or, we have to have mass exodus from this world.

But personally, a kudzu jungle would look really good in Detroit. It would spruce things up a bit, you know?

And yes, Kurt Cobain wrote Heart Shaped Box. But he was actually reffering to a bit of women's anatomy that is only figuratively connected to the heart.

Josie said...

Ivan, I am having an image scrimming and trying out different avatars. Which one of these looks better?

And how come you never visit me anymore, Boychik? said...


Don't know it it's my computer too.

Having truble here too,though I think it's my recent malady.

Tech and health problems seem to take Forever to clear up--I won't even begin talking about FaceBook.
I'll visit your site presently.

Josie said...

Ivan, you seem to be more your old self lately.

I am more my old self too. said...

I hear you, Eric.

In a dada state of mind, I recall on old stry wherein Sir Walter Raleigh somehow let a fart escape his pantaloons in Good Queen Bess' court.
Said the sprited Queen Elzabeth, upon seeing Sir Walter again, "Sir Walter! We've quite forgotten about the faht."

Anonymous said...


I like the one of you and Leslie.

3/23/2008 5:03 PM


Anonymous said...

Hi Charles,

Sorry for not answeiring sooner; took a nap.
Yes, don't we love those sunshine States!-and I've visited most of them.

Recent cold weather has me longing for a real
Spring here in Ontario.

...maybe as early as next week!


H.E.Eigler said...

Happy Easter Ivan! Our Calgary weather hasn't been too bad but it is so unpredictable we could be freezing our buns off in 10 minutes. Stay warm!

Anonymous said...

Hi Heather,

It's snowing cats and pooodles out here in Ontario. On Easter MOnday!


eric1313 said...

No better place to fart in public than here on your blog, Ivan!


I could only wish for short memories on the part of friends. Especially in regards to some of my more foul utterances, or should I say, eminations.

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