Monday, February 08, 2010
Bugs Bunny, you are bugging me. Did you know you can be a real asshole sometimes?
This is a blue Monday on which I think I'm down to my ninth life.
Sylvester is finally going to be done in by that blue-eyed smartass Tweety.
Like they say in Newfoundland, "he's so disorganized he can't even manage a shit fight."
Familiar story. Out of booze, out of cigarettes and out of luck.
...And Tweety is right in there. "I tought I taw a puddyta!."
Landlord at the door. Ivan on the floor.
"So what else is new, says friend Creighton, a cartoonist whose own publishing company just went for a dump. Low sales...."You've been down, say, how many times? You're an expert at it. No surprise."
Durn. All that meticulus planning budgeting, scheming.
And, as they say in Toronto, "Jackpot. You f*cked up again."
Surely there must be some reason for this apparent masochism.
Maybe I am trying to inflict pain upon myself so I can get over the snag in my novel....Hell of an economical way to do it....And to have once been once the richest novelist in town. Now eyeing the ashtrays in front of the pub, to stick your arse out to be kicked.
...And here is the news editor of the Era and his girlfriend from" A" TV channel in Barrie, ON.
They almost bowl me over.
"Let some people through."
I am probably punishing myself for ten years work and only two pieces published, published large--but only two pieces?
That's like in the movie, The Owl and the Pussycat, where that writin' cat couldn't get past Page One, so he went out and got laid instead. Maybe that's the trouble!
Even my best friends are saying, "Ivan, get the rag out. Time you wrote somethin."
I can't write nuttin.
All I can do is write crap like this.
Well, who knows. Maybe I'll make money at last.
Or make a paper airplane out of this and aim it at that pesky canary's tailfeathers.
I did, I did. I did tee a puddytat!
You should join your pal Bugs Bunny
"Eh, what's up Doc?...Aren't I an asshole"
I have become Elmer Fudd, in a Beatles's Captains uniform, blowing bubbles out of my bathyscape.
I can hear Bugs Bunny.
"If you bite at the bubbles you're a Snark!"
"Bugs, did you know your could be a real asshole at times?"